Best of craigslist – classified gold

You don’t need to dig around for hours to find the best classified ads on craigslist.

They did it for you.

Read the them here, including quality submissions like this:

Cute Stool Sample Nurse
I came out from the restroom in your office on Blanco at Bitters and you were sitting there, half-hidden by the frosted sliding glass window. Sandy blonde hair, purple scrubs, sitting at the desk with that cute smile that some orthodontist must have been very proud of. I handed you my sample cautiously. It was slumped to the side of the clear container, slightly smeared and mushed at the top from where I had to break it off to fit the lid on the jar. You gave me a cute grin and asked the silly phrase “Did everything come out OK?”, to which I stuttered out a broken ‘yes’.

It felt like an eternity as I stood there, mesmerized, before I realized that it was just plain awkward. I promptly left the office in embarrassment and thought of you for most of that evening, graciously accepting my excretions, smiling while doing so.

I have been back but have not seen you there. I made an appt. for problems with diarrhea and when you weren’t there, I took the cup home, in hopes of bringing it back at a time when you, and your beautiful smile, were present. I wish I could find a different, and less embarrassing, affliction to be treated for, but your head physician specializes in that type of diagnosis.

If you read this, and felt same connection I did, please email me back.

Photo credit: Creative Commons

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